Not perfect, but getting there

Last night was not perfect. I didn't nod off like I should have, so I had to get out of bed. That was hard. Really hard. I wanted to just stay there, but that's the kind of thing that leads to a bad association with your bed and not being able to sleep. I had to get out of bed twice. But finally at about 1 am, I fell asleep. Woke up a couple times, but was able to nod off quickly. The thought still crosses my mind, that Ambien would sure be nice, that it was nice to not have to work for my sleep, that the pill would just do it for me, but I will never ever go back to that again. Not after all this hard work, not after this hell that it put me through. I trust my body. I just need to give it time to learn and heal. It's not gonna happen right away, but I have faith that it will.